Craft Beer Name Intervention

Eno Sarris, January 15, 2014

Today is Sort By Style+ Day at BeerGraphs, so let's do this thing. Add up all the pale ale variants -- English, Australian, American, Double, Triple, Black, Imperial -- and then sort by Style+. Do you see it?

Come on people. Listen, I know beer is fun. And craft beer is irreverant. But don't you want just a little bit of professionalism in your brand? I mean... look at some of these beer names:

  • Everybody Get Nikkid
  • Bier Und Shizz
  • Mad Decent
  • Ruining IPA For Everybody
  • I.P.A. Fu...cking Perfect Harvest
  • Blitz

These are top-25 beers by Style+! And yet. It's not surprising -- not at all -- that these beers all disappear when you click the "Popular Beers" filter on. There's a fundamental difference between those titles above and then the weirdest popular beer titles in the top 25 popular beers by Style+:

  • Zombie Dust
  • Redrum
  • pseudo Sue
  • Fuzzy Baby Ducks
  • What is Enlightenment?
  • Horns Ups

Right? Perhaps there should be a ten-step process to double-checking the name of your new Sure To Change Craft Beer Forever IPA. If you answer yes to any of these things, return to step one and begin again.

  1. Is there a cuss word in your title?
  2. Have you combined three different languages, one not real, in your title?
  3. Does your title include slang words from another decade?
  4. Is your title a sentence, and if it is, is it inane?
  5. Is there an obvious reference to sex in the title? (Labels depend on tastefulness)
  6. Do any of the words in your title end in z?
  7. Could you ask your mother for this beer without being embarassed?
  8. Would your beer name stick out (in a bad way) if it was put next to the other beers you produce?
  9. Does your title play off the word hops? If so, can you at least make sure that particular play on words has not been done at least five times before?
  10. Ask your most negative friend what he thinks. Did he say anything about punching you in the face?

This has been a Craft Beer Name Intervention.